Sporting News, The: Are you kidding me? - College football: Insider

Out of the tunnel: Remember when those carefree boys from Fresno State were the hit of the college football season? Funny how fast it all unraveled. In a span of three weeks, Fresno State lost two games, had a player suspended for a game by the WAC commissioner for (another) cheap hit and trashed a chartered plane.

After falling to Boise State, their first loss of the year, the Bulldogs hopped a plane for a game at Hawaii. At the end of the flight, flight officials said the plane looked like a "disaster area." Sort of like Fresno's BCS plans.

By the way, coach Pat Hill guaranteed the Bulldogs would win their final five WAC games. So they've got that going for them.

Talk the talk: It wasn't so long ago that John Robinson agreed to run the athletic department at UNLV. He said UNLV could be the next great university of the West. Then he set out to coach the football team--the job he originally was hired to do.

A month into a season of high expectations, the Rebels were staring at an 0-4 record and regressing. Robinson then guaranteed UNLV would win its remaining seven games and play in a bowl game. The Rebels are 3-2 since that guarantee--and officially out of the bowl picture after last week's loss to Utah.

Because UNLV saved money by hiring Robinson for two jobs, thus guaranteeing his job security, TSN has come up with more cost-cutting measures:

* He must coach the gymnastics team.

* He must drive the university bus to all road games.

* He must agree to stay at the $5 blackjack tables.

Dirty laundry: So athletes are coddled and cajoled, huh?

Early last spring, Florida receiver Jabar Gaffney and two other players found two youths trying to steal motor scooters outside his apartment complex. One teen ran, and the players allegedly beat the one who didn't get away. The Gainesville district attorney dropped the case because of a lack of evidence.

The teen's mother admitted her son was in the wrong but said he shouldn't have been beaten. Now she's filing a civil suit. Can't you just hear it: "Your honor, I know he was trying to steal the scooter, but those football players shouldn't have gotten so upset. The boosters can buy them another scooter."

B(C)S: Virginia Tech's slump can't be good for Miami's geek numbers. The Canes' marquee game now is no more than another Big East slugo. Still, commish Mike Tranghese isn't worried. Just like he wasn't worried last year, when he boldly claimed Miami would get to the Orange Bowl if it won out. Memo to Mike: Please see Roy Kramer about the unknown subtleties of the system.