With these bank statements, who needs bank shots?"

"It doesn't matter if you stink, as long as you are stinking rich."

"Please, someone, help me with my wallet."

It's a difficult task, coming up with a proper slogan for my favorite collection of NBA players. That would be members of the Bryant "Big Country" Reeves Memorial Team, a group that best represents the NBA's overpaid masses, one chosen annually based on the vast difference between its performance and its paychecks.

Mind you, the BBCRMT committee understands that blame for absurd overpayment fails on management, not players. Still, some BBCRMT members are notoriously lazy. Others are genetic lottery winners who happen to be really, really tall (six of the 10 members are full-time or part-time centers). Others just had exceptional timing.

There are ground rules for making the team. Waived players are not eligible--out of sight, out of mind. Players injured more than half the season (Allan Houston, Penny Hardaway) get a pass. Players with new contracts are not eligible. It's unlikely Jerome James and Joe Johnson will live up to their new contracts, but we'll give them a chance to prove they can't.

Once they don't, perhaps they can crack this lineup, the 2005 BBCRMT:

1. Jim Thomas, SF, Knicks: $14.5 million. Thomas was awarded a monstrous $67 million contract from the Bucks in 2000 when it appeared the Bulls and Magic might make big offers. He averaged 12.0 points last season and often was outplayed by rookie Trevor Ariza, who will make less than 5 percent of Thomas' salary this season.

2. Adonal Foyle, C, Warriors: $7.7 million. Foyle has been a tireless activist for getting college students politically involved. A lot of good that does the Warriors when they need a basket in the post. Foyle will make $41 million over five years despite averaging 4.5 points in 21.8 minutes last season.

3. Jason Collins, C, Nets: $5 million. Collins is a decent defender, but he shoots 41.8 percent from the field, which is bad--if you're a guard. For a center, it's impossibly bad. Collins' twin brother, Jarron, is a center for the Jazz who has put up similar numbers (better shooting, fewer blocks). But Jarron makes $1.8 million.

4. Austin Croshere, SF, Pacers: $8.9 million. Croshere chose a good time to peak--in the 2000 Finals, averaging 15.2 points and 6.0 rebounds. The Pacers coughed up $51 million for Croshere that summer. Alas, he's a defensive liability and a streaky shooter. Croshere is lauded in Indy for being prepared and professional. For $8.9 million, a little professionalism doesn't seem much to ask.

5. Keith Van Horn, Mavericks. $15.7 million. The Nets thought they had a star when they gave Van Horn $73 million in 1999. Turns out they had a nice role player. He is Dallas' seventh man, but he makes more than anyone who took the floor in last season's Finals except Tim Duncan (who gets $100,000 more).

6. Maurice Taylor, PF, Knicks: $9.2 million. Taylor can be a useful post scorer, but he plays defense as though he has somewhere else to be, and he seems more likely to work on a bacon burger than a Bowflex. Taylor's averages (7.3 points, 4.0 rebounds) are lower than teammate Mike Sweetney's (8.4 points, 5.4 rebounds), but Taylor will make $7 million more this season.

7. Michael Olowokandi, C, Timberwolves: $5.9 million. Seems safe to file Olowokandi in the bust bin. When it comes to desire, he's Mr. Roper and basketball is Helen. Last season, his seventh, featured career lows in scoring and rebounding.

8. Scot Pollard, C, Pacers: $6.2 million. The Pacers survived the loss of Brad Miller two years ago, but Pollard had as much to do with that as, say, Zan Tahak. Pollard battled injuries last season, but even when healthy the previous year, he averaged 1.7 points and 2.7 rebounds.

9. Antonio Davis, F/C, Bulls: $14 million. Bulls coach Scott Skiles calls Davis' leadership "invaluable" to the young team. But the bet here is if Skiles were forced to put a value on that leadership, it'd be far south of $14 million. Davis averaged career lows of 7.0 points and 5.9 rebounds last season.

10. Kelvin Cato, C, Magic: $8.6 million. Laugh all you want about teams that overpay based on good postseasons, but the Rockets gave Cato six years and $42 million based on a good preseason. Cato is a solid defensive big man, but for $8.6 million, is developing a hook shot too much to ask?

Read Insider Sean Deveney's blog at sportingnews.com.

sdeveney@sportingnews

BARGAIN BIN

Picking a team of overpaid players is not difficult in a league where the average salary is around $5 million. What's truly tough, though, is finding enough players to round out an anti-BBCRMT.

1. Ben Wallace, C, Pistons: $6.5 million. A small price to pay for the Defensive Player of the Year.

2. Primoz Brezec, C, Bobcats: $2.5 million. After withering on Indiana's bench, 2Brezec had a breakthrough season in Charlotte (13.0 points, 7.4 rebounds).

3. Earl Boykins, PG, Nuggets: $2.7 million. This jitterbug point guard consistently is one of the league's best sixth men.

4. Joel Przybilla, C, Trail Blazers: $1.7 million. After the All-Star break, he averaged 8.8 points, 9.7 rebounds and 3.4 blocks.

5. Bruce Bowen, SF, Spurs. $3.3 million. He's the best perimeter defender in the league.

speed reads

How about one summer without Dennis Rodman rumors? They have popped up again, with Rodman's agent telling any reporter who will listen that Rodman would like to return to the NBA. The man is 44, and even if he did not have a screw loose, he would be too old.

Despite losing coach Nate McMillan and backup Antonio Daniels, the Sonics are going about the offseason the right way--allowing restricted free agents to get offers, then matching them. Seattle did that with Damien Wilkins and is in a good position with Reggie Evans and Vladimir Radmanovic.

The Elippers got Sam Cassell via trade, apparently just to get something in return for losing Marko Jaric. This is supposed to be a team built around Elton Brand and Corey Maggette, but I with Cassell and Cuttino Mobley, the ball will not leave the perimeter and the defense will stink.

INSIDE DISH

A few members of the 2002 draft class are ready for extensions. It's a mere formality that Suns C Amare Stoudemire will sign a maximum-dollar deal soon. Bill Duffy, the agent for Detroit SF Tayshaun Prince, says he has discussed an extension for Prince with Pistons president Joe Dumars, but there is no timetable to get a deal done--the league deadline is the end of October. Warriors vice president Chris Mullin met with SF Mike Dunleavy in Los Angeles to discuss an extension last week. * Though Nuggets PF Nene has been mentioned in a handful of trade rumors in the past year, Denver has shot down all offers and seems intent on extending his deal. Nene's agent, Michael Coyne, says he has not yet discussed an extension with Nuggets G.M. Kiki Vandeweghe. It might be best for Nene to wait until some preseason games are played because he supposedly is in great shape after spending the summer working out in Cleveland with former Hornets and Cavaliers assistant Bob Donewald. * After the Spurs signed G/F Michael Finley for just $2.6 million last week, beating out the Suns (who offered slightly more than $1 million) and Heat (who offered $5 million), one general manager noted that the last time the NBA had a team that was as much a shoo-in to win a championship as the Spurs was the 2003-04 Lakers--a team, of course, that did not win a championship. But by adding Finley and PG Nick Van Exel last week, the Spurs' killer starting five now is boosted by the best bench in the league. * Finley's decision is expected to be felt by other organizations. With Finley in the fold, San Antonio opted not to re-sign SF Devin Brown, who left for Utah. Finley's move also opens the door for PG Damon Jones to re-sign with Miami. The Cavaliers, still in need of outside shooting, would have signed Jones if Finley had gone to Miami. The Nuggets, who also were interested in Finley, appear to have targeted PG Earl Watson, with PG Andre Miller likely to play more shooting guard. * With their city flooded and a long way from returning to normal, the Hornets are considering alternate plans for at least part of the regular season. One possibility: Las Vegas. Though commissioner David Stern has expressed strong reservations about having a team in a city where gambling is legal, the league has formed a stronger relationship with the Las Vegas community in recent years and will hold the All-Star Game there in 2007. By playing in Las Vegas, the Hornets would not interfere with teams in other markets.